The third party
by Xen-yakodo
Summary: A short story about Iruka deciding to go on holiday to the other villages to see if they are quite as mad as Konoha. Pairings include KakaIru, KoteIzu, GaaMatsu and much more...
1. An epiphany

This is my first fanfiction so please review and tell me how i'm doing. Anywho this is a short story about Iruka. Now i know what you're thinking. "Why Iruka?" I know he's boring and hardly used, but that's probably why i picked him. He's a third party. He's the most unnoticeable witness to the masses that anyone could pick out of the Naruto lot. So, enjoy yourself and keep reading. :D:D

* * *

An epiphany

"I NEED A HOLIDAY!!" Iruka once again awoke with a shout. He had considered this idea for about 10 minutes now… His mind bringing weird and wonderful images of the various lands a people he would meet and… gasp he might even learn new techniques that even Kakashi-san wouldn't know!!

"Iruka-san…" Speak of the devil…

Kakashi lazily rolled over and gave Iruka one of those glances that always made him smile. In jokes were great. Especially when they were really, quite horny. Kakashi smiled.

"You do know that if you do that once more you'll have to do the forfeit…"

Ah… The forfeit. A simple but perfect prank that, no matter how fun was, was always rather evil. Spiking Lee's Lucazade with half a bottle of sake. Neither of them really knew why, but there seemed to be something frighteningly amusing in watching half of Konoha go into evacuation until the jounin have successfully pinned down our green beast and then watching him attempt to apologize to everyone in less than 10 minutes as a new training exercise.

"No, Kakashi-san. This time I'm serious!"

"How can you possibly say that in those pyjamas?

Iruka ignored the comment. "I've decided that I will set off on a journey to all the capital villages of the shinobi lands."

"But why?"

"To see if they're as crazy as we are, of course!"

* * *

Short, huh? Well the next one will be longer, i promise and hopfully funnier too. See ya'. :D:D


	2. Upon leaving

I found out how to do the line thingy. Yay!! Anywho, this is the second chapter of my fanfiction so, please be absolutely brutal with the reviews and above all, enjoy reading. :D:D

* * *

Upon leaving

Iruka could see it now. He would leave Konoha. He would be like Jaraiya, a hermit. He could do it!

Promptly, he got up, clothed himself and began to pack; all under the amused eye of Kakashi. Finally, Iruka walked back over to the bed and lightly kissed his lover's forehead.. At this Kakashi playfully licked Iruka's cheek and complained "I'm going to be desperate by the time you get back, so don't be too exhausted, mm'kay?" He'd obviously realised by this point that his quiet lover was actually going.

"Sure…" Iruka smiled. "But, you'll probably have me tired or no."

As you can imagine, Tsunade wasn't expecting a visit from the young chuunin. "And what can I do for you? Iruka." She asked after wiping a small amount of drool from her mouth and removing the document that had stuck to her cheek. "Konohamaru hasn't escaped again has he?"

"No not quite. Although I don't know where he is at the moment…" Iruka pondered this and almost became quite worried, until he realised where worrying was going to lead him. _No. _He thought firmly. _I'm going this time, and not even that can stop me._ "I'm sure he's fine." He smiled and gave a pause. "He'll probably find his way back when he needs to eat." Iruka then signed the form, took his pass and left, feeling quite pleased with the smug cruelty he had put behind that comment. He had obviously never looked at Konohamaru's behaviour in such an uncaring way and, for now, it felt quite good. There would be time to apologize when he got back, he was sure.

When he arrived at the gates, Iruka smiled at Izumo and Kotetsu. They were deeply involved in a game of slaps, involving having to shout out the name of a konoha shinobi and an insult when someone lost. Unfortunately it appeared that, where they both wanted to get good hits in, they both seemed to want to lose just as much. The insults were getting louder with each hit too. "SAI – BLATANT VIRGIN!" "INO – CLOSET LESBIAN!" "KAKASHI – DOLPHIN FETISH!" It was only when it got to "TSUNADE –" That Izumo ended it by covering Kotetsu's mouth and pecking him lightly on the forehead.

They turned to Iruka and burst out laughing. Izumo gleaned at him and simply said "Tell me honestly," he paused to rub his forehead in embarrassment, "How long have you been there?" At this point Kotetsu wailed with laughter at Izumo's hesitation and just recovered to say "I'm sure he's been there long enough, Fido." His friend glanced at him with slight irritation, backed by a glint of horny affection. Kotetsu continued, "Anyways, what can we do for you? Iruka."

"Well I got this holiday pass from the Fifth, I'm off for a bit of a walk." Iruka handed over a small green scroll that showed how he was permitted to leave and, since he'd not had one holiday as yet, that the old lady didn't much mind when he got back. At this Izumo smiled. "Ah, Tsunade-sama's getting careless. This is what happens in peace time. People think they can do what they like, and war will wait for 'em."

Kotetsu pushed him off of his stool and ignored him. "I'm sure old piggy is just enjoying it while she can. Leave the poor kid alone, Fido." He giggled as a kick met his shin. "This is fine Iruka. Go right on through; we hope you have a good time. Where are you going anyways?"

Iruka hadn't quite thought about that. He knew he needed to see the shinobi villages, but how might he get into each one? And how would he find them? "I'm going to the other villages, to see if their as crazy as we are."

Kotetsu had lost attention of Iruka and was currently attempting to keep his friend on the floor. "Sounds good." He said distractedly. "Hope to see you soon." A pause. "Or… Late, if you're going for a while…- UNGH" He was overturned and Izumo faced Iruka with a faced down Kotetsu between his thighs.

"Bye Iruka. Send me a postcard yeah?"

The excited chuunin turned and walked away, flying a backward wave that, if directed in the direction of the playing guards, was meant for his home village. He'd be back.

* * *

Next he will go to the sand, so the best has yet to come. Review!!


End file.
